Wednesday, February 3, 2010

The Downward Spiral Pt. 1

Growing up, I was the typical youngest child. I had to be first in everything and had to have the last of everything. And of course, when it came to food, I just had to have the biggest slice of pizza, slice of cake, piece of meat, etc. Was I greedy? Nah, you see I have an older brother, and well to put it honestly competition courses through my veins pretty much in everything I did and still do : ) Every little thing was a competition and I never liked to lose.
My eating habits growing up were interesting. I had the metabolism like a champ lol. I must have because I don't know then how I kept off the goodies we always ate: cookies, brownies, etc. I mean every night we had either ice cream, or cake, or sometimes both! By the end of high school my father and I used to call our evenings "Birthday Party" time.
Anyways, I was a relatively active child; loved the outdoors, sports, riding my bike. As most children do, I went through the awkward body type stage in 4th Grade (I was a little overweight!) It was around this time I began attending a weightlifting program my father started for flag football, as well as participating in community basketball and softball leagues. My height shot up and my weight went down. I had finally grown into my body! My father also put my brother and I through plyometrics, calisthenics, and stretching 3 nights a week through my middle school and junior high years.
It was also during my middle school years that I became somewhat depressed (this plays a key factor into what happens to me later!) My self-esteem and self worth were bashed by my peers. I will never know why, but I was severely emotionally abused at school. Due to the reputations of those involved, no punishment was ever given, so it continued through High School. At home, it was just as bad. My own mother emotionally abused me due to what was occurring at school.
Sports were my outlet-Softball, Volleyball, Basketball, Weight Training, Cheerleading, Band, Daceline-anything to keep my mind busy. I dove into my school work and didn't really care much for "social" activity. I had a few friends and that was enough for me! Of course my bullies were involved in sports as well, but I kept my head down and trudged through, the competitive side of me would not let me quit.
So looking back at my adolescent years, we can say I ate poorly, was athletic, and had very, very low self-esteem.
As we know, our childhood and adolescence will effect who we are in adulthood.
Do you remember specific eating habits-such as being rewarded or calmed down with sweets instead of words of affirmation. In high school, did you binge eat or binge drink/party?
How about your self-esteem-were you teased or placed in a situation that, in your eyes, lowered your self worth?
How about physical activity-were you outdoorsy, active, play sports, enjoy working out or did you like to stay inside, watch tv, play video games, take naps?
Take a look back, do you see any habits in eating or physical activity that still exist today?
Next: The Downward Spiral Pt. 2